What makes a great Parent

There are many things that I tend to keep to myself or have only a very select few know about me. One thing that I like for people to know about are who my parents are. I have two of the best parents that a person can ask for and I would not trade them for anyone else. However, there is a little twist and let me tell you a little bit more about that story.

I am the second child to John and Susan. I have an older sister and a brother who is two years younger than I am. My parents did not work out together and divorced when I was about six years old. In the divorce my mother got custody of the three of us. To this day I am still not sure how that happened as she never really held down a job and was not very stable. Very soon after my parents divorced my mother remarried and had another son my half brother. My stepdad is a good man and did everything that he could to help raise us and make sure that we were taken care of. One thing that the two of us bonded over was collecting football cards and it was a great way to share something. To this day I still have those cards and remember those days as I was a child. He did a lot but also at the time he was not ready to be the sole provider of four kids three that were not his. Now, my dad was paying child support and we did get to see him every other weekend. This was all he could do as this was what was drawn up by the court system. Now, again I was very young and do not remember everything that might have happened, but I do remember a good amount. I do not know why my mother had trouble holding down a job but she did and we moved around a ton.

As a kid we moved around so much that I averaged at least two schools a year some years even more. We moved all over Virginia and even in and out of homeless shelters. How she still had us still amazes me to this day but she did. In a way I am glad to have gone through this experience as it has made me who I am today. It was an experience going up and it has taught me a lot over the years.

When I was ten years old my mother dropped the three us off at my dads doorstep since she could no longer take care of us. To this day I really do not know if it was that she did not want us or simply could not take care of us. Either way we no longer living with her.

Three years later my dad remarried to my stepmom Cathy and I have to say that was one of the best decisions he ever made. She stepped right up and over the years have treated us as if we were one of her own. I do not like using the title stepmom at all as she is my mom. It she who had attended my little league football games, was there for my high school cross country and track meets, the homecomings, prom, graduation, my two back surgeries, giving advice, and so much more. Susan never came to any of these activities nor did ever seem interested. As a kid and a teenager that is something hard to go through when your mother wants nothing to do with you. There were a few phone conversations here and there with her, but there was never any face time.

When I had my first back surgery I was a junior in high school. When I woke up in the hospital afterwards it was Cathy that I saw sitting bedside to make sure that I was doing ok. That really meant a lot to me and to this day it means even more. I remember being home after the surgery it had to be close to Christmas time and Susan had called and I was speaking to her. I informed her about the surgery and that it would be great if she would like to stop by sometime to see how I was doing and just to chat. She said sure, but that day never came.

To me a mom is not something who had to give birth to but the one that cares about you and that will be there for all of the special moments in your life. Helping you out when things are not going so well, someone to talk to when you need some advice, and someone who is going to teach you things about life. When it comes to Mother's Day, holidays, and any other day it has been Cathy that is there and who I am doing anyone these things for. Susan has never been around.

About five years ago Susan sent me a message on Facebook which only contained five words: "Hi Son love you Mom. This really turned me inside out for a few days as I had not idea on how to respond or if I wanted to respond at all. One of the biggest things that hit me was that she loved me and said mom. I have always wondered how do you love a stranger? Because to me that is what she and I are, we are strangers. The last time Susan really knew me was when I was 10 years old. I understand that she gave birth and must feel that little connection but how do you love someone that you have not wanted anything to do with for so many years. Now, I do believe in second chances and I was open to start talking with her and be friends, but the mother and son relationship would probably never happen thou. It would have been nice to have some sort of relationship though.

I ended up responding to her and she did not like what I had to say. I was not rude at all but I wanted her to know who I felt and that I would be interested in chatting as friends. She did not like this and went on slamming my dad. We exchanged maybe three messages back and forth and she stated to never contact her again.

Susan's birthday was on June 4th and to me it is a depressing day. I try to ignore the day as much as I can as it is a reminder of her and how she has acted towards me over all these years. My sister sent me and my brother a message and stated that we were being "Ass's" for not wishing Susan a Happy Birthday this year. My sister went on saying that I probably do not know when her birthday is and that I need to forgive and care. That Susan is still a person. I responded back to my sister and did state that I really do not care but also how can I contact someone when I have no contact information on her. My sister then fires right back at me that there is always Facebook. Well, Susan has blocked me from Facebook so there is no way for me to send her a message. If my sister and brother want to have a relationship with her than that it fine with me. As a grown person we get to make those decisions for ourselves, but for those decisions we should not be judged for. I really would love for all of my siblings to have a relationship with Susan and patch things up one day. Do I see that in my future I do not but, but I am someone who will say never say never. Susan would have to be the person to step up and act like a parent. She has not done so in 20 years and to be honest I do not see that happening any time soon. It hurts for me to say it but some people are not meant to be parents and some are.

I do wish Susan the best and I really hope she is having a great life. It is very sad that she has not wanted to be apart of her children's lives, and that is something that I cannot change. For my sister I am glad that she has found forgiveness for her and I hope that they do have a relationship one day. We were blessed with an amazing stepmom who has become my mom and I would not trade that for anything in the world.

Booking your Vacations

For those who do not know me I work in the hospitality industry and have done it for well over 10 years now. I really love what I do or I would not be doing it. There is just the enjoyment of making people happy and also the chance of training and developing my staff. Now, one of the hardest parts of working in the hospitality industry is dealing with rude and stupid people and also the people that feel that they are entitled to everything. This does not happen on a daily basis but it does happen weekly. I get to meet and talk to some of the most amazing and nicest people every day but then there are the times that I get to deal with someone that is very rude and takes the "customer is always right" motto to a whole another level. During this time of year one of the most frustrating things that I deal with are people who do not research their vacation or travel plans.

When it comes to booking a hotel reservation for your vacation don't you want to reach the place and the surrounding areas a little bit. Lately I have been looking into taking a vacation to Cancun, Mexico sometime this summer and I have been looking at many different flights, hotels,using google, and google maps to find the best deals but also a place that has everything that I might be looking for. I have my note pad that I use to write down the places that I need to look more into and places that are a no go right off the bat. On top of the page I have the most important things that I am looking for in a hotel while I am on vacation; internet as it would be nice to have it complimentary as I plan on checking emails, writing, and reading, close to the beach, close to some night life as I am going to be on vacation but also in case if I feel like going out, and it would be nice to have at least breakfast included. So, by having some guidelines I know what places I can cross off my list and others to take a deeper look into.

As I have been looking into places I use Google and Google maps to help determine the distance to the beach and what might be close by. Then I pull up the hotels website to see what they are offering in terms of a shuttle, restaurants, internet, pool, and whatever else I might be interested in. If their website does not fully explain their shuttle service then I know I need to call and ask about that at least. But, I am doing my research first before I call them that way I know that they will answer my most important questions that I have. Also, I would not be frustrating the staff by asking questions that can be found on their website. If I have to google and look up their phone number can't I also check real quick to see if they offer a shuttle to and from the airport. I mean that only makes sense to me.

That is one of thing that gets me when I answer the phone at work. I get all these questions about things that are listed on our website. I mean you had to look up the phone number why is it so difficult to click on the tab that explains everything the hotel has to offer. I got a call for a person about a week ago asking if we had a pool on site. I stated that we do not have a pool but there is a water park less than a mile away. The lady on the phone then states oh I thought you had a pool did you get rid of the pool? I explained that the hotel has never had a pool but there is a hotel close to us that does. She insisted that we have a pool and that I was lying. Then she asks if we have a shuttle to the airport. I explained that we do not but one to and from the closest metro station to the hotel. The next question that the lady had was about parking, did we have parking at the hotel and how much is it. I stated that we do have parking and that it is complimentary. That was the only answer that she was happy with. As I asked her what was it that she was looking for and if she had looked at our website before she made her reservation which was an advance purchase and non refundable. She said no she did not look at our website to double check these things. I really wanted to say to her 'why in the hell would you book a hotel reservation and not get any information before you did so?' All this does is get the person upset that they are not going to get the amenities that they want and they tend to be rude to the staff once they check in. I am sorry to say that it is not the staffs fault any where you stay that they cannot offer you want you want if the hotel does not offer it.

I was yelled at by another guests because I did not have a room that had two beds in the room with a pull out sleeper sofa. I am sorry but I did not design the rooms or sell you a room that I do not have. He stated that since I do not have want he needs and wants that I needed to give him a second room for free to make up for it. I was very nice to him, but I could not honor that request well to be honest his demand of a few room. But, again another sign that people do not research before they book.

For all of you travelers out there just a little advice, please look into and research your vacations a little more. Pull up the hotels website see what they offer and do not offer. And lastly do not take it out on the staff that works there. They were not the bonehead that booked the reservation for you. It only takes a few extra minutes to pull up the hotel facts page. So, if you want to be happy then you better put the time and effort in to making your vacation a happy vacation.

Do you have any stories that you would like to share? If so please leave all your comments on the Facebook page RollinwRenkadink.

Why is it so hard for people to drive?

Have you ever wondered why it is so difficult for people to drive properly? What I mean by this is that I have never understood why people have to drive 5MPH when going by a police car that has pulled someone over or an accident that is all the way over on the shoulder and is not having any effect on the lanes. Why do people feel that they have to look to see what is going on?

It really gets me that people will hold up traffic or take the risk of another accident in order just to see what is going on with some one else. Do you really have to be that damn noisy? I travel on one of the busiest and most trafficked road there is, I66 in Washington DC, and a good amount of traffic I encounter is from other drivers just wanting to see what is going on and drive 5MPH. There are days that it takes me an hour to go the 5 miles when it should only take about 15 minutes, and most of it is because people need to know what is going on. It's not like there is a cop standing out there giving everyone a play by play of what is going on nor is there a sign explaining the situation.

When there is an accident or roadwork that is blocking a lane why do drivers find it so hard to merge over to another lane? People will drive all the way up to the coned off area and not try to switch lanes prior to that point. Do people really think that they are going to get much further by going all the way up to the coned off area than merging ahead of time? No, instead all they do is hold up traffic even more. They think that they are these smart drivers but on the contrary they make themselves look stupid. But, this also goes for the bone head drivers that will not let someone over when they have their turn signal on. Don't these people know that traffic will speed up if they would let others over into the lane. It drives my nuts when I watch this while I am sitting in traffic. When I know a lane is going to end I tend to leave a good car and a half length in front of me so that others and merge over before the lane runs out. It's funny to count how many cars go by me and not move in front of me when I give them enough room. Again, drivers who are not smart.

In addition to drivers me not so bright they are also very lazy. I realized this the other day when I was pulling into the parking lot of the local shopping center. I parked my car as there were tons of parking spaces around. As I was walking from my car towards the entrance of the store there were 3 cars waiting for the same parking space as it was closer to the door. It made me laugh as there were at least two dozen parking spaces over where I was parked, but these people wanted the closest space possible. As long as it would take for these people to either wait for a space or drive around to find a close space they could have parked just a bit further away and walked to the store faster than waiting for a closer spot. Have people really have gotten this lazy that they do not want to even walk a few extra feet? Does it really make a difference to park a few spaces closer? These are all questions I ask myself as some times I wonder how some people even got their drivers license.

Can you Admit When you are Wrong?

Have you ever met someone that all you really wanted to do was either tell them off or just punch? I am not a anger or violent person at all and I tend to have a ton of patience, but sometimes a certain person comes along and you push all that aside. It is very hard to get under my skin and for me not to have a smile on my face, but the other day I had someone take me to the limit. I think that it was the point that he wanted to play the blame game, but did not want to provide any information on what happened.

This guy had parked his car in the wrong area and ended up getting towed. When I spoke to him that morning he kept saying that he parked over there and just pointed out the door. As I was trying to gather more information as to which area he parked in and ask a few questions he would not provide me with any answers at all. I informed the guy that the area that he is pointing in is not the area that he should have parked in unless informing someone about it. He kept on yelling at me telling me that I needed to fix it and pay him for the tow. At this point I was done dealing with this guy because no one was going to be able to get through to him or make him understand that he was also at fault.

The following day I spoke to this guy and apologized that I could have handle him and the situation better. To be honest I felt I handled it pretty well and held back on saying things that I really wanted to such as "You are a moron and should asked if that was an area that you could park in as there were signs that said you will be towed without a permit." Instead I said that I was sorry and that both parties were at fault usually I would reimburse 50% but I would give back the amount in full as I was trying to be nice. That we both made mistakes and that I was sorry on our end. He still could not admit that he was at fault in any way and that I needed to fix the signs out in the parking lot even thou they were not my signs to touch.

It just got to me that there are people out there that are just complete jerks and candasses. Why not just man up, grow some balls, and admit that you were wrong as well. It is not pride that you cannot admit that you are wrong it is being a bitch that you cannot admit that you are wrong. It's people like this that I cannot stand do not respect at all.

Have you met anyone like this? Please leave your story on my facebook page. www.facebook.com/rollinwrenkadink

Snow Day in the DMV

Last night in the DMV area we finally got our first real snow fall of the season. In most of the areas there was about 6 inches of snow and nothing too crazy. But, anything more that 2 inches of snow in the Washington DC area and everything is delayed, once we hit 6 inches of snow then the entire city is closed down as it is today. I have to say that the people who live up north in the Boston area watching the news this morning have to be laughing at us down here. I went outside this morning to clear off my car and get ready to head into work and the roads were not too awful. They were a little slick but nothing that would be too bad to still get out and drive on. Now, I did not go into work as today was my scheduled day off already but I was still going to go in and make sure that my staff was taken care, lucky for me my boss was there today.

I can understand giving the schools the day off as there are many neighborhoods that are slick and we do not want to risk any injury to the kids. But to have to close local governments, businesses, and everything else they closed today just makes me laugh. Now, I do not plan on really leaving my place today at all because I have no reason to, but also I do not trust others out on the road. I have learned that when there is snow on the ground in this area that people freak out and forget to know how to drive. Why advice to everyone today is to stay at home because I know you do not know how to drive and you are going to hurt yourself and others. But, also find your inner kid and go play in the snow! I had fun in the snow last night as it was coming down then I came in and had a nice hot cup of hot chocolate.

What are you going to do on this snow day? Make sure to leave your comments on my facebook page Rollinwrenkadink

Christmas music and movies before Thanksgiving

I was in the store over the weekend and I could not believe my ears, Christmas music was already being played. It is not even Thanksgiving yet and many stores have already put on their Christmas albums. Is it me or isn't it just a tad bit early for Christmas music and movies? I mean we are not even at Thanksgiving yet. I can understand if it is Thanksgiving weekend as that it the weekend that everyone really starts their Christmas shopping and gets into the holiday spirit.

I was in shock that I really heard Christmas before this weekend while I was picking up some groceries at the Safeway that is right next to my apartment. I have not even finished my Thanksgiving shopping and enjoyed the best holiday and I have to hear Christmas music already? It is just too early for that right now. I know that businesses want to get into the Christmas spirit and boost their sells but this is also how people get tired of the holidays as well. I actually did my best to get in and get out as quick as I could because I was not ready to hear Deck the Halls playing. I love the Fall season and Thanksgiving. To me Thanksgiving is the best holiday because it is the least stress of the holidays and I hate that everyone wants to rush right through it.

Thanksgiving you get to spend time with the family, cook a great dinner, play some games, football games, and a time to be thankful for everything that we have. It is a time to reflect on yourself and family and not take what you have for granted as we all do throughout the year. You are not worry about what presents you need to buy and if so or so is going to like what you got them. It's a time to come together with each other and really enjoy your time together. There is a lot that goes with Thanksgiving and I do not think people really realize that. Most just want to rush through dinner, take a nap, and get ready for Christmas. I get that many people love the Christmas season and so do I, but I do feel that to start getting Christmas lights, the music, the movies, and the rest before Thanksgiving weekend is still too early.

I am someone that does not start with the Christmas music, movies, and the decorations until the first of December. To me December 1st is the start of the Christmas season. That is when I start getting into the season and start getting my decorations out of the closet. Maybe I am Scrooge but Christmas music and movies should not be played until the first of December.

How Our Pets Mean So Much to Us

I came home the other night and as I opened my front door I had both my cats greet me as I entered. It is always a warm feeling when I come home from a long day or night at work and get to see that I am greeted by these two every day. I do not know if it is because they did miss me all day or if they are just hungry, but either way I love the feeling.

Growing up I have always had pets both cats and dogs. Living alone now it is easier to have the cats, but at some point I will get another dog at some point. But, that just makes me an animal lover and I really could not imagine not having any type of pet around. I have to say that I am a lucky one with my cats as they are both very friendly and have a ton of character. My orange tabby likes to play fetch, comes when you call his name, and likes to sit on your lap at night.

We as people get very attached to our pets that we tend to spoil them and sometimes treat them better than we treat ourselves. Now, I have not done some of these things but people like to dress their pets in clothing, there are doggy spas where they can even get massages, and so much more that the list can go on and on. The only way that I spoil my cats is just by giving them attention and buying them toys that they enjoy to play with. I cannot envision dressing my animals up in sweaters, jewelry, shirts, or whatever else people come up with.

All I know is that my cats make me happy when I am at home. I cannot imagine not coming home to them. How do you treat your pets? Do you have any funny stories that you would like to share?